Starry Night

Starry Night
By: Faseeh Biabani

Black and blue, a depiction of the weak
Colors of the sky, stand alone still
Vast amount of beauty, I cannot speak
Not that I want to, nor that I will.

Ironic affiliation with rest and peace
Like a sponge, I sit and soak it in
To me its a bearer of ease
To them it's an invitation to sin.

Glimmer, Glisten, Sparkle, Wink
The stars above light my way
Alone I stand to quietly think
Where did I trip, where did I stray?

Glance at them before I close my eyes
I pray You forgive me for what I've done today
Open them suddenly to my surprise
I see him stand to take my soul away.

It's not really my time yet is it, I quickly ask
I have so much to do, so much to see
I thought this game was supposed to last
Yet he stands there, indifferent to my plea.

Not much I can do or say to get rid of him
Thank God I asked Him to forgive me
The notion caused me to give in on a whim
And then before I could count to three..

Remembrance

Remembrance
By: Faseeh Biabani

I'm losing it. Losing hope, losing faith, losing sight
We quietly conclude in the middle of the night
Broken inside. Broken heart, broken thoughts, broken mind
Insomnia. Can't deal with the stresses of every kind.
Wounded deep. Soul affected by sudden caprice
Patch me up. I'm damaged. Please.. all I want is peace.
Tag on my neck, No Return, Refund, Exchange,
Tend to forget my destiny's prearranged.

Why me? We say it over and over again
Realizing that what is now versus then
Has us lost and hopeless with no sight of the end
Leaving us feeling lonely, miserable, with pain to tend
And wounds to mend, remembering the visions
Of the faults of our decisions
Prejudging the results to our fate
Faith, hope, and strength, just put to wait.

Why do you hurt yourself this way?
Why do you find yourself crying everyday?
Look where you slipped and not where you fell
I guarantee your heart and mind will begin to feel well
Because there's wisdom in what has been said
There's brilliance in the words that we've been fed
Plenty of ways out of the miseries that have taken control
Of every bit of our feelings and rationale, bodies and soul.

He does not place a burden on a soul which it cannot bear
All that He has asked of you is to lift your hands up in prayer
Now watch as the mystery unfolds right before your eyes
Now watch as the peace fills inside and puts an end to your cries
You'll look back at today and feel the difference of what you've missed
Optimism in every word, oh and sleep at night.. just as you wished
Now you've got it: The cheat sheet to the test, the key to success
Just pick yourself up, dust yourself off, and just go try your best
You make the effort, and He makes the way
So just smile, tomorrow's another day.

Apologies

APOLOGIES
By Faseeh Biabani

Why is it that owning up to our mistakes is so difficult?
Wanting to explore the world, inflicting pain as a result
Childish and young, yet all we crave is to be adults
Looking down at the youth, leaving nothing but insults
Only to realize our errors, in times like these who does one consult?

Knacking age and freedom
Lacking shame and wisdom
Joining in on the pressures of the system
Causing affliction, making our parents the victims
Blaming each other for the faults of our own
Too much pride and too much to hold
When only a simple word can cure our souls..

Respect your elders, and those younger will respect you
Reject your sins and errors, and He will reject you
Break a heart, and be denied when He resurrects you
But make a heart smile, and notice how it affects you
Sincerely apologize, and watch how it perfects you..

Sorry. Just one word that carries so much weight
A simple word that eradicates hate
An elementary term from an elementary trait
Yet a word so hard for our minds to create
What we crave for hearts to communicate..

I've done wrong and I've done right
Muster up the strength with all my might
Blinded by wrongs, God show me the light
To adjust my visions and adjust my sight
Stand up to my pride and put up a fight..

But you know what? It's time to put my pride to the side
Crush my ego, and let out what I feel inside
No more energy left to suppress what I hide
Take a dose of the medicine that I've prescribed..

Here we go..
I'm sorry for the mistakes I've made
I'm sorry for feeling so afraid
Sorry for all the pain that I have caused
Sorry for all the time that I have paused
Intentionally or not,
I take back what I've done and what I have not
Just so you can smile and say, "It's okay."

Appreciate

They say you don't know what you've lost til it gone, why wait to find out?







APPRECIATE
By Faseeh Biabani

.. I've been given the greatest gift
Every time I'm down, gives me a lift
Keeps me intact when I begin to drift..

I've got vision and I've got sight
I've got strength and I've got might
Envisioning goals of myself in college
Provisioning holes with endless knowledge
To witness both the sunrise and the sunset
Is a blessing which we always forget
Next to me, you find yourself a spot
Orange and yellow, tiny as a dot
The sun begins to vanish as the moon begins to show
Navy blue above, and the stars begin to glow
"What does it look like?" you desperately demand..
..How do I explain the sunset, to a blind man?

I've got feet to walk with
I've got a mouth to talk with
Run to have my message heard
Craft out my way with words
Call the Adhan before every prayer
Forget my worries and all my cares
"You there! hang on a moment, can you bring him a chair?
Hes got no legs, so please don't stare..
Just like you, he's here to pray."
I make a spot for him right away
Thumbs to our lobes
In our pearly white thawbs
Just in time, he somehow made it
To begin I shout, "God is the Greatest.."

I've got fame and wealth
I've got love and health
The people who know me
Are the same who show me
That money won't buy me love
It won't pay my respect
It can't cash my friends
What more can it inject
Than selfishness and greed
Distance me from what I need
But what about those who lack the green
Would you call them poor?
Even when they're rich on deen?

I have it all..
I've got family
and I've got friends
Endless power?
Or, empowering end?
Orphans cry in solitude
No mother there to give them food
No father to mooch for money
No siblings to laugh at something funny
Some with no friends to whisper secrets
No gifts to receive and none to get..
So why do I find
My constant whines
Echo down the hall
When truth be told..
I have it all?

Mine and Yours

Hello folks.. I know I promised more updates once school ended, its just that due to so many things I havent been able to find the time, and now that school is back in session again, I find myself endlessly on a computer wasting my time on other sites, other than this blog I mean. To tell you the truth, I sort of lost some interest in constant updates; either that or I've just been WAY too lazy to put anything up, my apologies. Every other day I'd remind myself to put something up here, and I guess now that Ramadan is here, it gives me more of a reason to make some creative, positive, and beneficial use of my time.


I'll be blunt. Right now, in the position that I am sitting, I am in no mood to bore you all with my endless ranting, therefore I guess I'll write another poem: a mixture of love, withdrawal, togetherness, and a whole batch of other feelings, perhaps? No, that would just cause, not only yourself, but myself as well just immense trauma. I think it would be interesting to see what people want me to write about, if you have any suggestions, PLEASE let me know.. Actually, I think I'll do this one on parents..

Mine and Yours
By Faseeh Biabani

When I was born, I felt your heart smile at me
Picturing all of the things I'd grow to be
Blindly certain I would never drown your name
In a dark black sea of embarassment and shame
Jumping through time as if making plans
Smiling to yourself with every glance
You saw me grow 30 years in your head
Educated, strong, and happily wed
And thats when you knew that you were content
With what you had and the nine months you spent
Hoping that one day I would truly see
How proud you were when I came to be..

Time passed and years flew by
I grew older and learned not to cry
Mistakes were made in order to learn
"Dont touch the flame for you shall burn
Eat your veggies, and dont complain
Stop your whining, dont chew my brain
Respect your elders and those who are younger
Don't eat all that candy, you'll kill your hunger
Clean up after yourself, and wash your hands
Use the towel, and not your pants..
Walk and don't run, for you shall trip
Look, now you're bleeding and your jeans are ripped.."

I got older, yet I was still young
I thought I was smart, only I still was dumb
Prone to error, I tried what I could..
I kept myself pure, just like I should
Promised my heart I'd never commit wrong
Yet my nafs was smart, and just too strong.

Everything you said not to do, I did
Every time you called me, I just hid
Selfish. That just explains who I truly am
Using you as part of my plan
Blaming your fatigue as my reason to run
Who would've thought that I was your son
Caring for no one other than me
Walking out when you needed me
I avoided you because you never cared.
Whenever you were in pain, I just stared.
You cried and cried calling my name
But I'm not a kid anymore, I'm not the same

You were in the kitchen when I tried to leave
You called my name, begging me to eat
I zoned you out, and quickened my paces
You shouted for me to tie my laces
I rolled my eyes and shut the door
And stormed down all the way to the first floor
Far away, I found myself walking at the lake
Remembering how you and I alone would take
Long walks here when I was so much younger
How you covered my ears when I heard the thunder
You held me tight and told me not to fear
Because God is great and you wiped my tears

Then suddenly I felt my feet slip
I stepped on my lace and felt myself trip
I felt a chill and then it got hotter
And I fell slowly into the water
Struggling I dashed for the top
Unable to swim, I felt myself drop
I felt myself sink, lower and lower
I knew right then that it was over
Little did I know that my first words would be my last
My lungs filled with water and I knew I was going fast
My eyes began to close and I knew I was going blind
So I yelled the first thing that came to mind..
"Mama.. Mama.."

My Tears

MY TEARS
By: Faseeh Biabani

Life is an endless struggle even with your prayers
I hold a sorrow which only I can bear
Where have you gone?

I stand alone and whisper, "save me"
For I see my soul steadily betray me
As I see my past trying to blame me
While I see my heart menacingly shame me
When I see my guilt forcefully declaim me
And I see my nafs frantically inflame me
Where have you gone?

It hurts. I want to cry but the tears wont flow
The words come out but the message doesn't grow
I've kept my eyes dry and my will so strong
Determined to let it burn for it doesn't belong
I've scrubbed and scrubbed, but the dirt doesn't stray
I've used the finest soaps, yet my face remains a darkish gray
I need internal cleansing.. cleansing of the soul
Tearing of the eyes.. Thunderstorms of the heart
Where have you gone?

Oh guardians of my Nile, give life to my prayers
Give liberty to my soul, Give ease to my heart
Give freedom to my eyes. Give a beating to my guilt
Give wealth to my mind.. Give hell to my nafs.
Give rest to my conscience. Where have you all gone?

What are tears, I ponder to myself
Nothing more than indescribable feelings
Love, hatred, fear, guilt, happiness, anger
Each tear inscribed with its own emotion
Each engraved with a story
Yet as inexplainable as our reason for life
Each tear heavier than our passion for relief
Yet as light as the petal of a rose
Each tear, as inexpensive as air
Yet as pricessless as our childhood
Where have you gone?

My struggle continues..
Without you I have no relief.
Thank you for abondoning me.
Where have you gone?

I close my eyes yet I know I'm still lost
The stars of the chain are my path
Help me home for I have strayed
Guide my heart.. you are my astrolabe
Where have you gone?

A rustle of leaves and the army's behind me
White robed and turbaned side by side me
A palm on my shoulder heaves my burden
I rest assured, as my heart stops hurtin.
So many opened, yet only one more curtain..
I have their guidance.. That is undoubtedly certain.
But, where have you gone?

Just a Little More

-Ok I've been neglecting my blog for way TOO long.. time for an update.. I'm gonna treat you all to my very first piece, I had actually lost it for the longest time, and my brother suddenly found it this morning, so I figure, hey why not? I call it.. Just A Glimpse-

Just A Glimpse
By Faseeh Biabani

Just a glimpse, a tiny glimpse is all I need
The satisfaction is beyond words, what more can I ask for
The peace and content of my eyes is the result
What achievement can be greater? Just a glimpse..

Just a smile, that smile I’m desperate for is all I need
The satisfaction is beyond words, what more can I ask for
It’ll cool my soul and soften my heart
What achievement can be greater?

Just to kiss his hands, those blessed gentle hands is all I need
The satisfaction is beyond words, what more can I ask for
It’ll purify my lips, resulting in constant durood
What achievement can be greater?

Just to fall at his feet, those bruised at Ta’if is all I need
The satisfaction is beyond words, what more can I ask for
My forehead will cry of embarrassment due to my sinful being
But to be at that state, what achievement can be greater?

Just to send my salam, full of love and respect is all I need
The satisfaction is beyond words, what more can I ask for
Knowing he replies causes my heart to stop, just so that I may possibly hear him
What achievement can be greater?

I yearn and wait to see his face, but the more I yearn, the more I am put to wait
Yet after all this yearning and waiting, I know the reward will be sweet
No amount of sugar can be substituted for the taste
That taste that I will taste from drinking Kauthar from his blessed hands

Just a glimpse, a tiny glimpse is all I need
The satisfaction is beyond words, what more can I ask for
But until that day, the air of Madinah is fine for me..

Born Again

BORN AGAIN
By: Faseeh Biabani

I open my eyes, much like the first time
Fragrance of roses, its strong like springtimeI am worthless, and rather infantileI'm in your hands, and you just smile
I savor the feeling, I savor the length
In which you help me, and raise me to strengthFor I Have Been Born Once Again

Stepping into this new world,
Once before, yet now once more
My ship has sank and I'm washed ashore
Tossed and thrown, skin and bones, weak and white
I hear ur footsteps, and I'm blinded by your light
Through blurred vision, I'm adjusting my sight
For I Am Born Yet Once Again

Washed of sins, clean of crime
You lift my hand, and I know its time
To link myself with those of your kind
A new way of life, a new state of mind
For I Am Born Once Again

"Bless you".. to eternity
I need you, you don't need me
You come to me when I'm in need
You are spring rain, and I am a seed
I grow not, without your lead
For I Am Born Once Again

Hold my hand as I learn to tred
Alive again, when I once was dead
I live my life by the words you've said
Cried for you when you had bled
Grasp the tears, the tears you've shed
For I Am Born Yet Once Again

My friends, my crew
My company.. all are new
Following with me are just a fewYou tell me what and whatnot to doAs I am standing here, next to you
For I Am Born Once Again

You teach me, what I know not
The actions I'd done, and the thoughts I thought
I leave you not, its engraved in my heartFor I Am Born Once Again

I bow my head in shame in your presence
Indeed you are a king, and I am a peasant
I fall at ur feet and breathe in ur scent
But you lift my chin and smile at me
Tell me to repent, to pay no heed
'cuz He hasn't forgotten those few good deeds
For I Am Born Yet Once Again

I just cry when I cant cope
I start to smile as you restore hope
You cover me with your white thawb
I stop my shivers as you carry me close
Over your shoulders I see the Green Dome
And thats when I know that I'm coming home
For I Am Born Yet Once Again

You gesture for me to follow
And I move not less your command
I see myself fall but you still hold my hand
From doing evil, I am banned
For I Am Born Once Again

My nafs brings me close to the flame
Attracts me to join in on the game
You smack my hand and warn me of the pain
Now I see it and naturally refrain..
For I Am Born Yet Once Again

To myself, I hum this tone
Keeps me warm when I am cold
You have that effect, as I am told
I close my eyes and see you here
In my heart, I hold you dearYou have helped me excel amongst men
Look at me now, and look at me then
For I Have Been Born.. Yet Once Again